Initial crushes don’t last forever. After a few beautiful rosy years, it can fade away, the relationship becomes mundane and begins to decline. How to revive it so that even after years you can enjoy beautiful moments with your partner?
Gradually, you no longer have the desire or time to write love messages with your partner, to buy gifts just for the heck of it, to surprise yourself, to make romantic gestures. But isn’t that a shame? The beginnings of a relationship are always the most beautiful moments in which you can feel carefree, loved and happy. You prove your love to each other, you’re always there for each other and you can’t imagine a minute without each other. You are precious to yourself, so all beautiful moments are also unique.
However, after a while comes mundanity. You spend every day together and sometimes you might even get on each other’s nerves. If you feel that your relationship is on the decline, it’s time to revive it. In order for happy feelings to last, both partners must try to make the relationship look like it did at the beginning. Think about what made you happy or how you enjoyed spending time together. Rekindle old habits and create new memories. We bring advice for both men and women on how to bring the spark back into a relationship.
Advice for women
Love and encouraging messages
Before you leave for work or shopping, write him a nice note. Stick a note on the fridge saying that you enjoyed your dinner and enjoyed your evening. Leave a note on the bedside table that breakfast is waiting for him.
There are no limits to your imagination – create messages of love or encouragement and hide them wherever you like: put them in a trouser pocket, a backpack or a bag. Encourage your partner in them, write that you are looking forward to him, wish him a nice day. These small gestures cost nothing and have a guaranteed effect.
Every day when you come home from work you ask each other “How did it go?”. It has slowly become a routine that you both answer in the same monotone. Be more curious, let your partner know that you perceive him. Ask how the meeting went or if he turned in that assignment he worked on all weekend. Specific questions stimulate a full-fledged conversation. By showing your partner that you care about what they’ve been up to during the day, you’re letting them know that you care.
Give him the evening he wants
Allow your partner to make the evening according to his ideas. Let him invite his friends over, or help him prepare refreshments. Whether they watch football all evening or play console games, it doesn’t matter. Allow your partner to have time for themselves. You will make him happy and you will have time for yourself.
Prepare a romantic dinner
It doesn’t have to be an anniversary, although an unexpected dinner may surprise your partner and at first he will wonder what he forgot. Cook your favorite meal and enjoy it together. Complement the meal with good wine, decorate the table with candles. Experience a little romance together and remember the beginnings of the relationship, which were filled with such experiences.
Surprise him sexually
Over time, even love life is not as hot as it was at the beginning of the relationship. Try to surprise your partner with unexpected oral sex, you can try sex in nature or in other publicly accessible places. Treat yourself to some adrenaline. Buy sexy lingerie and prepare a romantic and passionate evening for your partner. If you don’t know what you would like to please your partner, try asking about his sexual fantasies.
Advice for men
Prepare a bath and massage for your partner
Prepare your loved one a hot bath, put foam in it, maybe even rose petals, open her favorite wine (or something else she likes), strawberries with chocolate and light candles. Create the perfect oasis of relaxation where he can relax. Women love hot and fragrant baths, so this gesture is sure to earn you plus points. You can prepare the bath just for her, but also for both of you. After the bath, finish the whole evening with a relaxing full body massage.
Clean the whole house
We don’t just mean washing the dishes. We mean a thorough cleaning of the entire house. Vacuum, mop, change the beds, wash, dust. Or at least do what you can. If your significant other comes home from work with the feeling that a “second shift” is waiting for her at home, she will be pleasantly surprised upon arrival and will definitely want to repay you for your efforts.
Bring her bouquets for no reason
This is not just a one-time event. No one wants you to buy expensive flowers, one rose or gerber daisies is enough. It will last a whole week and will always remind your wife how you feel about her. If you only gave her bouquets on her birthday, she might think you did something at first, but don’t worry, if you wear them regularly, you’ll soon see the sight of a happy and cheerful woman. Because if he feels that way, he will radiate those feelings on the outside.
Women like to look good and they like to be appreciated for their efforts. Pay attention to what your wife is wearing and don’t hesitate to tell her that she looks good in that new summer dress or that she has nice hair. Women love compliments, so you’ll definitely score points. Thanks to this small attention, you will show your partner that you notice her.
Advice for both
Trying to revive a dead relationship should not be violent. Pushing the saw will not help in this case. But what will definitely help is to try to restore the relationship together, for example by playing games, creating joint projects or trying new things.
Glass with 100 reasons WHY
Think of 100 reasons why you love your partner, for which you are grateful. Write them separately on pieces of paper, then throw them into the decorated glass. This idea can be used, for example, as a birthday or anniversary gift. Come up with just 10 or 20 things. You can also create a glass together with your partner. Write each of your gratitudes on a different colored piece of paper and then take turns drawing them and reading them out loud. This way of reviving a relationship will both amuse and delight you.
Go out into nature together
Just take your partner for a walk in the forest, go on a small trip together or have an afternoon picnic in the meadow. Prepare a good meal and bring some bubbly too! A nice walk can suddenly turn into a romantic afternoon. If you are active athletes, try going for a bike ride or a run together. The important thing is that you do these activities together.
In a partnership, you are not only lovers, but also friends who can have fun together.
Write “your book”
Buy a nice hardcover notebook and call it Our Book. Then make each page like one month, where you write what you have done and experienced. You can also add tickets to the cinema, festival or theater where you went together. You can then enrich each page with a quote or message or decorate them with joint photos. This way you will actually have such an album full of experiences.
One of the most important points that applies to every type of relationship. Be honest with yourself, don’t be afraid to talk about your feelings, don’t hold anything back. At the same time, always try to understand the other person’s point of view and feelings. Try not to get angry if your loved one blames you for something, first think about whether there is some truth in that statement. Practice the “communication hour” every day or every other day. Use the time together, for example, at dinner, breakfast or in the evening watching TV.
Perceive and listen
Notice what your counterpart is saying and what they are interested in. Find out what his wishes and desires are and try to fulfill them. Does your loved one often talk about needing to go to the hairdresser? Try to order it with him. Does he often tell you about the new game that just came out? Buy it for him. Listen to each other and think about the well-being of your significant other.
Know your love language
In the book The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman, you will discover that each person has his own love language, which means that he expresses love differently and wants to receive it from his partner differently. The book has already helped many couples return mutual love to their relationship and establish a harmonious relationship.
Learn to experience all the important moments together – the good ones, but also the stressful and exhausting ones. That’s what marriage is about. Listen to your partner, support him and let him know that he is not alone. This will strengthen mutual trust and understanding. Do not stand against your partner, but try to support him in difficult situations and be his support.
Living together is sometimes difficult. You spend every day together and the list of annoying things keeps getting added. But in between all this, you will definitely find moments when your partner pleasantly surprised or pleased you. Notice these little things and let them know you appreciate them. Showing gratitude will have a positive effect on your relationship. You will soon learn that he can be filled with kindness and helpfulness.